What's Love Got to Do With It?

Ultimate, we've been through a lot together. We've had our ups: starting the ISU women's team, placing 2nd at Nationals after being seeded 10th, making Nationals after being down 9-12 in the game to go and the other team dropping it in the endzone, going down under for Worlds, going to Nationals as a club women's team, getting chosen for the College Alumni All Star team, too many Poutlry Days too remember.....the list goes on and on. We've had our downs: losing about 17 games to go that first year of CLX at regionals, losing too many 1 point games at Worlds, debilitating IT band and lower back injuries, concussions (but only 1 serious one, and I forgave you), only playing 3 of 5 of my college regionals, only beating one club women's team at Nationals....but even those memories draw us closer- they made me work harder to be better, push me to overcome prior failures.

Not just the momentous occasions but all the regular good times we've had with people- it hasn't been just you and me, but all the people we've met together- played with, played against, partied with, cheered on. Wow. There have been weddings, a few births, plenty of people to teach and to learn from, people to set both negative and positive examples, people to rejoice at seeing at each tournament.

You changed my life. You made me what I am today; I can hardly bear the thought of leaving you, even for a few years. But you've become an obsession. That was okay for most of college, but I've come to a point where brains (at least, my brains) aren't enough. I need more time, and, babe, unfortunately, you're all I have to give; it's only ever really been school and Ultimate, since school got serious. And let's face reality- together, you and I can't pay the bills. School can do that for me; it sounds mercenary, but it is just realistic- we can't live together in some idealistic fairy castle, with green grass, a light breeze, and lined fields. I can't live in a trailer my whole life, I just can't!

We can still be friends! No, really! We can meet casually each week for pick up or league, but after this summer, well, that has to change, too. This will be our last, bittersweet summer- hopefully I can take away memories (all of them) of a wonderful Poultry Days with people from throughout our time together, people that have been there with us since the beginning: Kevin, Saienga, Chad; people we made some of those good times with: the CLXers, both old and new; and maybe even some new teammates: Wimer & Jerrod Wolfe. Maybe we can share a summer league title, finally: it can be the Summer of Chocolate. And then, in the fall, well, we need to make a more severe split. We can come back together, as professionals, to coach in the spring, but then, well....it may REALLY be over, at least for a time.

I can't tell you how sorry I am that school and a career had to come between us. It isn't just the time you take to play, or even to train, but I love you so much that if I am playing you, I can't get you out of my head- I'll be focusing my microscope when suddenly my pulse jumps as I relive the D I missed at the last tournament, or the one I got, or even visualize the perfect, game winning D. I am thinking of training schedules and travel logistics when I need to be learning a skill to make my way in the world.

So, this is the pre-goodbye, the adjustment period for us to cherish and hopefully to look back upon with peace. I'll never stop loving you.-RJD