Friday, August 31, 2007

How to be inspiring when one is uninspired

Today has been not so good for me. Not horrible, and I need to keep that in mind, it could be much worse, but just tough. It should motivate me to work harder & study more, but it just makes me want to quit & to eat. And eat. And eat. I could, you know.

My Ultimate scene is drying up- no place to play during the week w/o sacrificing coaching. My poor performance in school and frustration there is spilling over into the other areas of my life, as it is likely to do for the next year, at least. I still want to workout, although the morning runs haven't been as often as I intended. I still have good workouts on the days I do them. It is what to do with those Tuesdays and Thursdays....I can't wait until Lana gets back; I have some ideas.....but time becomes a problem- if I go straight to Scorned practice from work/school & spend 2 horus coaching, it is approaching dark by then- what is a girl to do? I NEED CHC, and need it badly; I need to play. The visualization step is happening b/c I am thinking about Ultimate so often. Now I am almost wishing I would have held a practice this weekend, but then when would my trailer become liveable?

When I feel this way, I want to be around people that just naturally cheer me up. On the other hand, I don't like to be a downer & don't want to risk bringing people down. The solution, of course, is to find some Ultimate (in the longer term), study until sprint time (now term), then spend MORE time throwing and practicing layouts. All right, I think I've begun to talk myself through this.

2 comments:

Unknown said...

masturbate!!

ellsworthless said...

Ha Brenda.

What about the naturally cheering powers of Zany Matt?

WTF I am doing, this is like the 4 comment on your blog today. I need to work.